There Is No “t” In My Surname.

Gingerbreed is the first IMDb-listed film I’ve done. As such, I am now in the IMDb!

Though the Oracle of Bacon has not yet updated their own database to reflect this, I have done some research and determined my Bacon Number to be 3.

I’m back! Leah, my VSLF, has put a delightful selection of photographs on Flickr. Also, here is a terribly droll video of the first time she intentionally ate insects.

Unconnected Things I Learned In Oaxaca, Mexico:

• Very few people smoke
• Many young women wear sassy English-language t-shirts. A selection
  • You Really Don’t Impress Me
  • I Need More Fun
  • Lovely Angels Dream Girl
  • Spend All Your $$$ On Me
  • Turn Me On
  • I’m An Angel (not to be confused with another shirt we saw, “Soy Una Angel”)
  • I ♥ Oral Sex
  • I Need More Vacations
  • Hardcore (with an icon of an applecore)
  • ALL THAT and a bag of chips
  • Blah, blah, blah. NOBODY IS LISTENING TO YOU
  • I Never Give Out My Number On The First Day Of School
  • I Got Out Of Bed; What More Do You Want?
  • New Model Army (funny because thirteen-odd years ago it was one of Leah’s favorite bands)
  • Hey Yo We’re Not Those Kids Darling
• If putting salsa on bread & butter is wrong, I don’t want to be right
• Unless specified, dishes at a restaurant will be brought to your table at a fairly staggered order (e.g. if A & B each order an appetizer and a main dish it will not be unusual for A to receive his main dish, then, five minutes later receive his appetizer, both before B receives anything)
• Jack Skellington is surprisingly popular — but as Leah pointed out, the movie’s very Dia de los Muertos

Today my woman and I are flying off to Oaxaca for some west and wewaxation! I’ll be back on the 13^th.

I got an email last night from the members of successful geniune NYC band Dynasty, who played soon-to-be-successful fake suburban band “The Sexy Champions” in an MTV2 commercial (for On The Rise — popups ahoy!) I was in late last year. They’ve put up a site (sexychampions.com, of course) at which one can watch said commercial.

I’m a little disappointed at how it turned out, ’cause I came up with all kinds of things to say as my indie-rock-nerd character:

…and you don’t get to hear any of them, ’cause I end up just being in the background.

Dynasty is/are very nice people. I like their song, “Hypnotized”

It wasn’t public access, they made a point of saying. It was proper UHF, complete with interstitial commercials. My interview was live, at 12:30 AM. Here it is:

I got what I needed to get done:

• Tell a story about my colon and a snowboarding videogame ☑
• Get told by the host, “yeah, you’re weird.” ☑
• Curse my similarly-named nemesis ☑
• Pimp Mingle and my website. ☑
• Compare a student film I did (if only in name) to upcoming smash hit Snakes on a Plane ☑
• Do my Kermit the Frog voice ☑
• Get invited back ☑ (to bring a tape of me singing Hit Me Baby One More Time)

You may note that (until I unintentionally corrected them) they captioned me with my nemesis’ name.

I went to a work schmoozy thing last night, and what did my nametag say? That’s right:

Jonathan Hartford

My whole life it’s never bothered me that much, and now it drives me crazy. I shall never allow it again*.

* Though when the girl at the nametag counter handed me mine she was so overworked yet friendly I couldn’t bring myself to be petty. But from now on, pettiness shall be my middle name!